MARRIAGE AND RELATIONSHIPS.

Raising healthy balanced children.

Raising children who are balanced is not easy to accomplished. However this is a task that every parent hopes to achieve. From throwing tantrum as todlers to teenage assertiveness most children pass through these stages and still turn out great. You might hear things like I’m not eating this whilst dinner is being served in some homes across world. Conversely, some kids actually beg for beans and carrots. But those children live in other people’s houses. The rest of us cajole, coerce, and otherwise bribe or threaten our kids into consuming their vegetable quota for the day. Some of our ploys work; our kids even like certain vegetables. Some days we don’t even try. But when we’re determined, we’ve been known to shred and otherwise camouflage the nutritional gems, in the name of growing healthy children. Exasperating as the great veggie capers may be, parenting would be a breeze if this were our only challenge.

Setting the benefits and “yummy-ness” of carrots and other healthy foods pales in comparison to addressing the encompassing question of how to raise a healthy, happy, and balanced child.

Some days this requires more of us than we have to give. But it’s important to remember that even little changes can make a big difference. The effort is worthwhile because, after all, who really wants to raise (or live with) a child who is anything but happy, healthy, and balanced? Companies with massive marketing budgets are competing for kids’ attention from the time they’re toddlers. Picture some fast food chains and all the promotions geared towards children. So the next time you are in one of these restaurants order a healthy food for your child.

Tips for a happy marriage.

It is important to understand the various needs and desires of both men and women in this fast technology changing world that we live in. Here are the different kinds of love needs:

Women Need: Caring, understanding, respect, devotion, financial support, intimacy, affection validation, reassurance, honesty and openness.

Men Need: Trust, acceptance, appreciation, admiration, sexual fulfilment, domestic support, approval, encouragement and companionship.

To acknowledge different kinds of love essential to each gender, does not mean that men do not need any of the love essential to women, and vice versa. It therefore implies that good understanding of these essential loves that your partner needs is a powerful tool for improving relationship and achieving great friendship with your spouses.

For example, when a woman expresses her trust and acceptance of her husband, he begins to reciprocate and automatically return his respect, devotion and care to his wife. In the same way, when a man shows care and expresses good understanding to his wife, she instinctively and automatically reciprocates with trust and appreciation of him.

Men become fully perceptive and appreciative of the love needs of women when their own primary or essential needs and desires are first fulfilled. Likewise, a woman can truly value and appreciate her man’s essential love needs and desires when her own parts are fulfilled.

A man feels empowered when he is trusted, accepted, appreciated, admired, approved of and encouraged. A woman’s encouraging attitude gives hope and courage to a man by imbibing confidence in his ability and character. To trust a man is to believe that he is doing his best and that he wants the best for his spouse.

A woman’s attitude and good character can indeed encourage her man to be all that he can be and motivates him to give her all the love needs and desires that she may need for a happy married life.

THE DIFFERENT EMOTIONAL NEEDS OF MEN AND WOMEN

In a relationship between husband and wife, love needs are different and so can be expressed differently. Husbands typically give in relationship what men generally want, while women tend to give what women naturally want. Instinctively or otherwise, men and women always assume they have the same love needs and desires. As a result, most couples end up dissatisfied, resentful and unhappy with each other occasionally leading to marriage problems.

As our society (modern society) is getting big, complex and sophisticated, so are our needs and desires. In order words our world is moving and progressing with science and technology bringing in things like computer-Internet advanced health care facilities, different ways of earning a living such as employment and investment. Family set-ups and expenses are also increasing as -we embrace expensive education, training and life style. All these affect marriage and relationship, impacting on our love needs and desires.

HOW TO SOLVE TRUST ISSUES IN YOUR MARRIAGE OR RELATIONSHIP.

There are some people who have no trust in their relationship, or the trust they have is being eroded.  This is how you maintain it. You should be able to talk to each other, hear each other out, communicate, communicate one after the other.  When one person is communicating, you should be able to keep quiet and listen to that other person talking, assimilate what they are telling you, and after you should be able to ask them questions so that they would know that you actually understood what they were talking about. When this has finished the other person repeat the process.  That is, you are hearing each other out.   You will be honest to talk about any controversies that you may have in your relationship.  When you finish this you will be repeating this process. Do not talk about the past so much, when something has happened and it is in the past, leave it in the past.

DOES LOVE AT FIRST EXIST?

The answer is yes, love at first sight exists. So much so that when you meet your soul mate, when you meet your partner, something in you leaps up, that you feel like opposite sides of a magnet attracting each other. So in that angle, love at first sight does exist.

Love is an intimate personal activity that seeks, the happiness, the welfare and the safety of another. When you love somebody, you care for them, you are interested in their happiness, you do things for them, you are interested in their safety, so you make sure they have security, you try your personal best to make them happy all the time, so that is love.  I like what the scripture talked about love in first Corinthians, chapter thirteen verses one to thirteen, where the virtues of love were being talked about.  Love is not arrogant, it is not boastful.  Love seeks to protect.  Of the good virtues, love is the greatest.  Jesus Christ actually told us to love our neighbour as we love ourselves. So at this point what is there not to love about love.

IS IT TRUE MEN ARE FROM MARS AND WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS?

Know the truth and love your spouse the best way

Too often male-female differences are at the root of marital problems. The friction is not due to the fact that men and women are physically, emotionally, psychologically, and culturally different from one another, but from the fact that we don’t understand those differences or work to accommodate them in our relationship

In contrast, a marriage grows and thrives when a husband and wife understand and accept that God has designed them to be different and complementary.

PHYSICAL DIFFERENCES

The most obvious differences between men and women are physical but that isn’t what causes the most friction in marriage. Nevertheless, understanding that God made men and women different physically is important when two lives are blended into one. Let’s look at some of the physical differences between men and women:

  • Women live an average of 8 years longer than men.
    • Men are usually stronger and able to run faster and lift more weight than women.
    • Men have XY & XX chromosomes; women have XX chromosomes.
    • Men have a greater amount of the hormone testosterone, which increases their tendency toward aggression and physical activity.
    • Men lose weight faster than women due to the lower ratio of muscle and fat.
    • Men have a higher metabolic rate than women.
    • A man’s blood gives off more oxygen than a woman’s.
    • Women have greater endurance than men.
    • A woman’s capacity to exercise is reduced 2% every 10 years, whereas a man’s capacity is reduced 10% over the same period.
    • Men are often physically aroused by visual stimuli; women are usually aroused by touch, caresses, and affection.
    • A man’s skin wrinkles later in life than a woman’s skin.
  • Our brains function differently. The male is more left hemisphere controlled (logical) and the woman is more right hemisphere controlled (intuitive, emotional).
    • Men and women are anatomically different, for instance the man’s pelvis is narrow; the woman’s pelvis is broad for childbearing.

Again, these differences do not usually pose significant challenges to the marriage relationship, but they do underscore the fact that God made us, male and female, quite different from one another.

How to balance your home and career.

HOW TO BALANCE YOUR HOME AND YOUR CAREER.

The age old question, can you have it all?  My answer to this question is that of course you can have it all but something got to give.  It depends on what you want to sacrifice. Your choice to make. So many people have approached me to ask how they could enjoy their family and home and still forge a career.  So this is how to balance your home and your career. It is very very important to women to know how to balance their home and their career so that none of them suffer. I always tell them to find out what is important and require more attention at that stage in their lives.  Some other people have approached me to ask if it is possible to have it all? Meaning to have a home, raise a family and have a successful career. The answer is of course yes but something got to give. You have to know what is important to you at every stage in your life.  When you are running a home and your children are still small, obviously if you put your career first, the children might suffer.  So you balance it, you figure out how to balance it. You might decide to keep your career on a hold at that moment to raise your children to a certain level, that might help you, that is if you are in a career that you can do this.  If you are not in a career that you can do this you can send your children to a childcare facility of course and then face your career. This is why I said that something got to give. It does not mean any one of these choices is wrong. It means what is good for you at that point, and what is good for your children.  But at the end of the day, the whole holistic picture is that it is good and that you can have it all.  You can have your home, you can have your career, you can have all of them together.

How to enjoy summer amidst the pandemic

Summer has arrived and lot of people are weary of taking holiday abroad due to the pandemic. Well there are still ways t enjoy yourself this summer. You can of course make use of your garden for those who have garden. You can enjoy barbecues and picnic and you can even go camping in your own garden. For those who do not have gardens of their own, don’t feel left out, you can pack up a well thought picnic and visit the nearest pack to you an have a blast time remember to follow the guide lines of your local area.